I have always admired people who had such strong beliefs that they never questioned them; life would be so much simpler that way. But, in the words of the great Charles Busch, "Ira, you are what you are!". And I am not not one of those aforementioned folk.
My spiritual credo is nebulous, best summed up as, "I can't explain what I believe, but I'll know it when I feel it." There are, however, a few truths I hold self-evident:
1. That whole "Do Unto Others" thing makes sense. If you don't want people to shit on you, don't shit on them. If you do want people to shit on you, please move along...
2. The whole "God wrote the Bible" thing does not make sense. Unless he's Harper Lee (hmmm....), you think he'd want to cash in on the royalites of Bible II, Eclectic Boogaloo, with all kinds of modern-day rules we should follow. "Thou Shalt Slaughter the Trans-fatted Calf and Fry Potatoes in it's Glorious Oil", stuff like that. And maybe put a qualifier on the cloven-hooves ban. "Oh, except for bacon, that shit's amazing."
3. I don't like guns. I'll go so far as to say I Hate Guns. However, you have every right to own one... (*arches eyebrow*) Responsibly... and I won't give you a hard time about it. So shut the fuck up about abortions and gay people.
4. I sometimes only make sense in my own head. (See #3, above).
5. Most of life is spent treading water, with the occasional jump off the high dive and a rainbow through a waterfall. It can be hard to accept that treading water is as good as it gets, but you should try, cause then it's easier.
Obviously, the above does not constitute the Greatest Story Ever Told. But, honestly, I don't think the Bible does either. I enjoyed "To Kill A Mockingbird" a lot more.