Thursday, May 16, 2013

I Feel Pretty, Kinda

I am not pretty.  I know that and I'm okay with it, although it was a rough road getting here. 

I once dated a guy for a hot minute who told me I was "Reasonably Attractive"  (be still my heart!), which is better than being Butt Ugly, I suppose.   But it probably also explains the extremely short lifespan of that relationship.

Us RAs have always had to deal with the Pretty Girls.  The easiest way is just to give up and don't bother flirting with guys because they're always going to go with a PG, not a RA.  It is has always been a miracle to me that I ever managed to hook up with anyone at all, so I'm never really disappointed.

It didn't help that I grew up in a house with a pretty sister and a beautiful mom.  They'd look at me with this, "What the hell happened with you?" look, and tell me not to feel bad,  that homely girls often grow up to be pretty women. One year (I think it was fourth grade) I was bemoaning my school picture and the homeliness therein, and my mother comfortingly said, "Well, what do you expect when you look like that?"  The Irish aren't big on unconditional love, but they are honest, bless their hearts.

Every cloud has its silver lining, and I think being an RA helped me develop my sense of humor.  It was either develop that or my razor blade skills and I'm not overly fond of blood.  But it's nice when people laugh at you.  That makes me feel pretty.  And now, in the autumn of my life, it's really helping me get gigs and acting makes me feel prettier than pretty, so I think it's a good tradeoff. 

Some of my best friends are PGs, and we laugh and cry and carry on and have a great time.  I love them and can see why guys do, too.  It's just a nice feeling to be comfortable in your own skin.

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