Friday, July 19, 2013

What's In a Name? (Letters, mostly)

Okay, I'm going to start this entry with a disclaimer:  I may have very well blogged about this subject before, thereby repeating myself.  However, I am a victim of Extreme Laziness, and don't feel like researching it, plus, also, if I can't remember, I'm betting that the three of you who read this can't remember either (birds of a feather, etc., etc.) so I'm soldiering on.

I have a thing about names.  I love them.  Much in the same way I love kittens and hugs/kisses, and beer.  I get all giggly and warm and fuzzy inside when I hear a name I like.  For instance, my favorite current cat name is Tallulah Fuzzypants.  See???  And we just got a package from a law firm whose name is Tuggle Duggins.  Adorable, right?  You cannot say those names without smiling.  Really, you can't. Something horribly vile will happen to you instantaneously if you try.  So don't.  You've been warned.

One of my all-time favorite names is a High Society, Ultra-Snooty, Dripping With Money, Pittsburgh (Imagine if Mt. Brook and Greystone had a baby, dipped it in gold, and covered it with diamonds) marriage from the 70's, when Tracy Titsworth married Sterling Pankratz.  Those rich muthas deserved those laughable names!

Now, Debbie, you chide, they can't help what names they have, it's not nice to make fun of them.  Debbie to Chider, Fuck Off.

My love for quirky names probably stems from the fact that my name is so boring I yawn every time  I say it.  Debbie...*yawn*...Smith.  And before I was a Smith, I was a ...*yawn*...Brown.  It sometimes makes me regret breaking off that engagement to Pepe Poopacarcheck. 

One of the ironies (others, I assume, covered in my possibly existing previous post) of my Name Love is that names themselves (adorable or otherwise) are my Achilles Heel (I orginally typed "hell", which would have worked, too) when it comes to learning lines. (Okay, there were waayy too many paranthetical phrases in that last sentence.  But I like them, so they're staying.  Oooo...I'm feisty today!)  In the last play I did, I had to remember 4,397 Jewish surnames.  Oy Vay!  And in the play I'm working on now, the names are in French.  18th Fucking Century French.  Quelle Merde!

Well, that is the yin and yang that is life.  And struggling over a Markowitz-Waldbaum or Merteuil is well worth the joy of uttering the best attorney name ever, Bob Lablaw.  (Courtesy Arrested Development) So let's hear 'em, guys and gals.  What are some of your favorite funny names?  I'm listening....

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