Monday, June 11, 2012

Ch, Ch, Ch, Changes

Change is inevitable.  The only constant is change.  Embrace change.  (Stop me if these never-before-heard phrases become too shocking.)  Guess what the topic of today's blog is?  Good for you!  More than just a hatrack, heh?

Anyroad, I am coming up on a big change in my life, with starting a new job in two weeks.  I have been at my current employ (aka: Job That Must Not Be Named) for ten years, so it's going to seem pretty weird not to show up here on the 25th.  But I do weird things well, and I actually do enjoy embracing change.  (And anyone else willing to embrace me.  I'm currently accepting applications.)

I think theatre people go through more change on a regular basis than civilians do.  Although it is cyclical:

Find out about audition
Prepare/get psyched for audition
Prepare/get psyched to hear about results of audition
Embrace results of audition (and celebrate or mourn, accordingly)
If not cast, return to  step 1
If cast: rehearse; open show; run show; close show; strike (and celebrate or mourn, accordingly)
Lather, rinse, repeat

Though I must add that it never feels exactly the same way twice (kinda like pregnancy, though I don't usually throw up at auditions so much).

Have 438 years of being in theatre in any way prepared me for dealing with my upcoming Major Life Change?  Of course not.  (You just lost your points earned in the first paragraph, sorry.)  I am still excited, nervous, elated, scared, anxious, trepidatious and slightly nauseous, aka:  Monday.  I sort of know what to expect and I have no idea what to expect.  It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. . . . . you get the picture.

One thing I have learned after being alive 440 years (I started in theatre very young), is that I am an incredibly strong woman.  I spent the first 50 (Actual Number) years of my life being emotionally abused, but I have fought my way through that past shit to realize that not only am I not an incapable, next-to-useless human being,  but I am, in fact, a phenomenal, amazing and fabulous human being.  You have no idea how hard it was to type that last sentence.  Wow.  Okay, I think I'm getting too maudlin (not to mention ferklept) here--time for a fresh paragraph.

Anyroad, so I am blundering my way through all the above-mentioned emotions and going to do this thing on the 25th.  And do it well.  

Change I can believe in?  Maybe.  Change I can handle?

Absolutely.  I Am Debbie, Hear Me Roar.

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