Thursday, July 26, 2012

Just Stuff

A few years ago, the Army had a marketing campaign whose motto was, "Be All You Can Be".  I don't know if that's possible.  At least not for me. 

I certainly can't Be All I Want To Be.  I want to be tall, I want to have straight hair, I want to be able to dance and sing really well, I want an acting career, I want a bra that really get the idea.  None of those things are possible in Debbie Reality.  Meh.  I've reconciled myself to most of them, though  I will never stop searching for a bra that really fits and makes the girls look good and is comfortable, and doesn't cost a small fortune.  It has to exist, it just *has* to. Some may say that I'm a dreamer. . . . .

This does not mean I don't like who I am--I do.  I am a Strange Bird, but thanks to a year in therapy and some awesome drugs, I have come to embrace my Strangeness and think it's kinda cool.  I no longer feel guilty or feel that I'm a bad person because when I care, I care too much; that I take my acting and improv work so seriously;  or that I gave Bad Steve all my money.  It just means I think with my heart more than with my brain; I have an undying passion for my art and I am Unbelievably Naive and truly thought Steve  loved me and would pay me back.  I was wrong.  I backed the wrong horse, which is why you won't find me hanging out at the track.  But none of those qualities make me the Subpar Individual I used to believe I was.  They just make me...Me.   So while I don't know if I can ever Be All I Can Be, I am content with Being All I Am Right Now.  Which is a Short, Curlyheaded, Klutzy Receptionist with Saggy Tits.  Who is happy with her life. 



  1. Goddammit, I know it's cheesy as almighty Hell, but I suppose it's like Sheryl Crow says, "It's not having what you want. It's wanting what you've got." Of course, easy to say when you look like her, sound like her, have her money, etc. But, Debbie, hardly ANYone is happy with who they are or how they look. I have an insurmountable force in my life known as depression that manages to tip the boat every time, and when it tips, all the wonderful "qualities" of mine drown with me. You're a candid, infectiously funny person and I sincerely hope you ARE happy with your life. Much love...

    1. Thank you, dear Juan. Love you!

    2. Thank you, dear Juan. Love you!

    3. Hey, how did you know it was me? Not that I mind.